Posted by Brian on Dec 20, 2010 in
Book Reviews When I received my review copy of “Churched,” I realized immediately that I hadn’t read the description from the website very carefully.
I thought that it would be about kids in general growing up in a churched home, and how to help them through difficult transitions and such. Boy, was I mistaken! What I got was something totally unexpected, and I ended up reading it in one evening.
Mr. Turner’s memoir of growing up in an Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Church was funny and yet poignant. Not being from an IFB background, I couldn’t relate to everything written, but could understand a lot of the confusion growing up in a system that had lots of rules yet few, if any explanations for them that could be supported with Scripture.
One of the things that stood out to me was this sentence:
As a church, we could only watch as the world burned. God didn’t want us wasting our time trying to help things get better. Jesus was coming back! To save us from earth’s misery.
This was followed a few paragraphs later by:
Once we got to heaven, Pastor Nolan promised, we would be rewarded for how much we hated living on earth.
Being a pastor, this sent shivers down my spine. I hope that I would never give the impression that we should not do something to help alleviate suffering and help people find the transforming power of Jesus in their lives, thereby actually bringing some positive change in society. It’s true that we should “hate” the world – in other words, put our allegiance with Christ above all – but that doesn’t mean we should not be involved in helping people.
As I was reading the book, I was continually evaluating whether I was passing something down to my children that would cause them to have the reaction that Mr. Turner did to his own upbringing. Lord, help me to avoid this error.
Lots of humor throughout the book helped me not only enjoy it, but also to think through my concerns about my own parenting without the weight of condemnation.
His stories of soul-winning contests (You haven’t truly witnessed for Jesus until you’ve done it in hopes of winning a packet of sea monkeys.), haircuts, and his father’s fashion sense were really fun to experience through his eyes.
I also appreciated how his struggle to shed the straight-jacket religion he grew up on did not cause him to reject Jesus. This is the case all too often, as I’ve seen in my office as a pastor. I may not even agree with some of his concerns shared near the end as he visits with his pastor. But I’m thrilled that he continues to want to seek, love, and live for Jesus.
I LOVED the book, and can’t recommend it highly enough – maybe especially for those who have been burned by church growing up, because it shows that hope is not lost, and that while your church experience may have been less than admirable, Jesus Himself is still true. The book is easy to read, light-hearted, and filled with story after story to keep the reader going.
Disclaimer: I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.
Posted by Brian on Nov 18, 2010 in
Life in General,
Pastoring/Leadership I found this in the latest edition of Leadership Journal:
We don’t talk about this one very often, but a major distraction in ministry is procrastination. I do not have a biblical illustration for you, but Jonathan Edwards wrote a fascinating discourse on Procrastination, or the Sin and Folly of Depending on Future Time. His key verse was Proverbs 27:1 – “Boast not thyself of to-morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth.”
He defined procrastination as presumptuous dependence on another day in which to do that which needs to be accomplished today.
“Therefore the words which forbid us to boast of tomorrow cannot be extended so far as to signify that we ought in all respects to live as if we should not see another day. Yet they undoubtedly mean that we ought not to behave ourselves in any respect as though we depended on another day.”
Edwards’ point is that we should not delay in coming clean with God and doing the soul-work that we need to do today. I do not think he would mind me applying the same principle to the pastoral work of the ministry leader.
How many times have I put off making that phone call, or visiting that shut-in, or confronting that person who is not going to be a happy camper when we tell them what they do not want to hear?
“I’ll do it tomorrow,” we say to ourselves. Aren’t we “boasting of tomorrow” – presumptuously depending on another day rather than depending on the Lord to give us wisdom and strength for today? (Dave McDowell, pastor of Community Fellowship Church, West Chicago, Illinois; Leadership Journal, Fall 2010)
Unfortunately, he is describing me. Procrastination is one of my “best” traits – I’m very good at it, whether with ministry-related tasks or away from the office.
Obviously this isn’t something to be proud of, and this article was used by God to convict me mightily about it.
So I’ve determined to start TODAY to do something about it. First, I’m putting up this post, as a reminder to me as well as an encouragement to you. Second, I will be taking care of some things that need to be taken care of so that I can more effectively take care of the sermon and funeral prep issues for the weekend.
Following that I will be cleaning my office and planning each day the day before – therefore being proactive rather than reactive. Because one of the consequences of procrastination is that you have to react to what happens rather than planning for what should happen, or at least being more prepared for the unexpected – which happens all the time in pastoral ministry.
For those of you who aren’t pastors, the principle is still the same: don’t put off until tomorrow what you should do today. You may not have another day, so take care of whatever it is you’ve been putting off, especially in terms of telling and showing your family how much you love them and strengthening your relationship with Christ.
For others, it may be that you’ve been putting off a decision to put your faith in Christ alone for forgiveness of sins and hope in heaven, thinking that you’ve got plenty of time ahead of you. I hope you do. But don’t presume on God’s patience.
Anyway, I need to get to some other work. Blessings on you all.
I had a discussion with one of my congregation members recently about a sermon I gave on judging. In that sermon I said that I don’t think drinking and smoking are sins. The Bible says that drunkenness is a sin, but it doesn’t say drinking is.
As for smoking, there is nothing in Scripture that says anything about it. I know that tobacco wasn’t an issue in Bible times. But God, all-knowing, and outside of time, knew about tobacco and cigarettes. And therefore I think He would have put something in the Bible about inhaling plant fumes that can be addictive.*
Please understand – I’m not trying to be sarcastic or cynical in the least. I truly believe what I just wrote.
The person talking to me believes these are sin, and that I am giving people permission to sin. My defense is that if God does not call it sin – either directly in Scripture or falling under general Scriptural principle, then I cannot call it a sin, either. And the Bible does not call these sin.
There are any number of things people call sin and any number of things that people don’t call sin. What should be the standard? The Bible. God, the Ultimate Lawgiver, laid down rules and laws for our protection. When we live within those laws, we live relatively trouble-free lives. When step outside of those bounds, we open ourselves up to the consequences, some of which are just natural results of our foolish decisions.
So CAN drinking and smoking be sin? Yes! When?
- When you do it around someone who might stumble (recovering alcoholic, someone from an alcoholic family with a disposition for drinking), or who isn’t ready to make decisions about that yet, such as young children outside of your own family. If you do that around them, you are risking hurting them or pushing them down a path from which they may never recover. If you are a Christian, you are responsible to God to do all you can to ensure you are not causing someone else to sin or do something that may not be technically sin, but might harm them.
- When you do it around someone who does consider it a sin. In this case, if I were to light up around this sweet person who talked to me, I would be in sin. She lost her husband to smoking-induced lung cancer, and to callously smoke around her or brag about my freedom to do so would hurt her, and knowing that, I would be in sin. At least two people in my congregation grew up on abusive alcoholic situations, and have understandably strong feelings about alcohol in any amount. Therefore, it would be sin for me to do so where they might see it or even hear of me doing it. I need to respect them and their convictions just like I’d want them to respect me and mine.
Just for the record, I don’t do either of these things. I smoked, drank, and smoked marijuana in high school. I quit smoking the summer before I started my senior year in high school. The last time I was drunk was New Year’s Eve end of 1982. I didn’t quit because I became a pastor (I was in my mid-30′s when that happened), and I don’t abstain because I’m a pastor. I don’t do these things because I simply don’t need them anymore, and because I’m around people who would be hurt by my doing them, not the least of which is my awesome wife and kiddos, as well as these people in my church.
So here’s the question for you: do you think drinking and smoking are sin? Why or why not? Think carefully before you answer, but please do answer. I’d love to hear what you think, and I’ll share more as I get your responses.
*BTW, I’m talking about tobacco, not marijuana. Growing, possessing, and smoking marijuana is against the law, and the Bible says we need to obey laws that are not contrary to God’s laws.
Posted by Brian on Oct 29, 2010 in
Life in General My older son, Noble, turned 18 on Saturday, October 23.
He was born on my dad’s birthday. I was always going to name my first son after my dad, and having him born on my dad’s birthday was extra-special. Coinky-dink? I think not!
He is a junior in high school, and so is the oldest in his class – and I would say, based on the observations of others, that he is one of the most mature young man in the student body.
Today, however, I was really hit with how mature he is, as we went to the Post Office so he could register for the Selective Service. We ended up registering online, but as he sat at my computer to get it done, I was hit with the realization that not only is he 18, but more importantly, he is WAAAAAY more mature than I was at 18.
I turned 18 during my first month in college. At that point, my main plans for any given weekend included alcohol and/or girls. The drinking age was 18, so if I could get a ride to the bars, I could drink, although I did most of it a house parties where there was little or no cost to me, since I was totally broke. I was a loser when it came to the ladies (think Peter Parker in Spider-Man 3 as he’s walking down the sidewalk, winking at the women, and they’re just looking at him like he’s weird. That was me, only a few years younger and even more immature), and so none of my big plans came to fruition. Truth be told, I’m glad now, but back then it was just sad.
[At this point, I have to beg those who went to high school with me to NOT relate any of those embarrassing moments, especially from our senior year - embarrassing mainly to you, because you were with me. I was generally blissfully ignorant in my drunken stupor - until someone filled me in the next day, where shame became a reality.]
At my high school graduation, all I could think of was getting to the graduation party. To this day I have no idea where it was, and where it moved to. I just followed the rest of the crowd to both places. [Side note: on her graduation night, my daughter, Dani, asked if she could take me to the "Wolverine" movie in theaters. We had a great time...]
But here’s my son. Being mature, responsible, kind, respectable, and just generally easy to be with. I don’t find myself apologizing or excusing his behavior. I won’t have to worry about him being 35 and playing video games on my couch because he won’t hold down a job.
I’m proud of the decisions he’s made regarding his schooling. There have been at least 2 times where he was given an opportunity to modify something or take an easier way out (he’s dyslexic), but he turned them down both times, saying that he needed to have only those opportunities available to everyone else. School can be a struggle for him, but it says tons about his character that he is willing to actually struggle and work his way through rather than give up.
That’s being a man. Noble is a man.
I was an immature punk at 18. Noble is light-years ahead of where I was at that age.
The main foundation for that is not my wife’s and my awesome parenting skills, but rather that Noble loves Jesus and wants to live for Him. And he sees that living for Jesus means that Jesus should affect every part of your life, not just what you do on Sunday mornings. He takes being a Christian seriously.
Yeah, he’s got flaws. Probably no more than me, and as I’ve alluded to, a lot fewer than I did at that age. But seeing the track he’s on, I’m not worried. I’m confident that he will continue to develop Christ-like character as he continues through high school and whatever happens afterward.
Thanks for raising the bar, son. I’m proud of you.
Posted by Brian on Oct 27, 2010 in
Life in General On our most recent date night, my wife and I went to Max & Erma’s here in Aberdeen. We’ve been there three times now and every time has been great. The food is good and reasonably priced (price means a LOT on our limited budget).
But I’ve really been impressed by the servers. They have always been friendly and attentive, and didn’t seem too disappointed when we declined the day’s featured drink (we don’t drink alcohol). Even when things go wrong – which they do from time to time, I’ve seen them respond with patience and grace.
The last time we were there, something got messed up on a lady’s order. I don’t know what it was, but she and her companions weren’t shy about making their feelings known. The server did all she could to make the situation right, but it seemed these ladies were having none of it. She ended up being our server as well, and everything went just right. I was impressed by her response.
Having been a waiter in the past (at both a large private restaurant chain and a large pizza chain) I can better appreciate what servers have to go through, and thought I’d write down some things you can keep in mind as you go on your next outing. The points will be in all caps. I know that’s yelling – but that’s my intention. That’s what it takes for some people to get it sometimes. But if you want to make your server’s day, and have a much more enjoyable dining experience, read on:
1. BE PATIENT!
Believe it or not, you are not the only person in the place, and you are not the most important. Your server will be with you as soon as possible. Sometimes places get short-staffed if someone calls in sick and no replacement can be found. So your server may be handling more tables than normal. Sometimes orders get mixed up and they have to put out fires (hopefully not literally) at another table that may not even be there’s.
I can pretty much guarantee that the servers are not planning to cause you grief by making you wait as long as possible for extra tartar sauce or a water refill. That is, unless you have a reputation for being a major pain in the posterior. Then they might actually be trying to get you to never come back again. Believe me, the temptation for that is very real.
When you arrive at the restaurant, you may actually have to wait to be seated (GASP!). You will have to wait your turn (GASP! GASP!). And you may not get a booth – or window table, or whatever (GASP! GASP! GASP!). Get over it. They will do their best to accommodate you; but don’t pace around, muttering to your companions, pointing at open tables (they may be reserved for someone), etc.
After you’re seated, be patient for refills and such. Snapping your fingers or waving your empty glass in the air is NOT a way to get quick service. It’s insulting to the server and likely to get you ignored all the more (yeah – I did that a few times when I was waiting tables…).
2. UNDERSTAND THAT EVEN THE BEST SERVERS MAKE MISTAKES FROM TIME TO TIME.
I have to admit that I wasn’t the best waiter at times. I was okay, but I was never a superstar. I’ve met some superstars and they are a wonder to behold. They can juggle drink orders, appetizers, salads, main dishes, desserts, refills, and all sorts of things for small orders and huge gatherings. I was always amazed at how they could do that. When I came across situations like that, I would hope to simply not spill water on the people.
But even these superstars would make an occasional mistake. It was rare, but it happened.
It will happen when you’re out some night. The order will be wrong somehow. One time I got chicken instead of fish. Big deal. I ate the chicken. I made my server aware of it (in case someone else was expecting chicken), told her it was no big deal, and finished the meal.
If your steak is more rare than you like it, gently tell the server. They’ll take it back and make sure it’s cooked the way you like it. If you ordered fries instead of a baked potato, tell her. It’s usually no big deal and they’re more than happy to see that you get what you wanted.
I have found that when you are gracious to a server, they’ll break their back trying to get it right. But if you’re a jerk about it, why should they try very hard? You won’t be satisfied anyway. This brings up point number three:
3. WHEN BRINGING UP A CONCERN, BE A GROWN-UP ABOUT IT!
Sometimes stuff happens you can’t ignore or blow off. For instance, a hair or fingernail in the salad (those are health concerns that need to be brought up).
HOW you bring them up will make all the difference in how it is resolved.
The best way is to simply tell your server your concern and let them take care of it. You don’t usually need to ask for the manager, because the server will probably do that for you.
But in any case, don’t whine, yell, throw a tantrum, or threaten to have their job taken away. For cryin’ out loud, you’re supposed to be an adult, not a spoiled brat! It’s very sad to watch a “grown-up” act like a child in public.
If you actually feel that your concern warrants a visit with the manager, then ask politely to see him, and then talk to him politely and calmly. You get results that way. If you’re a jerk about it, you may get a short-term solution, but you’ll never be welcome back in that restaurant, and their service to you in the future will show that, even if unintentionally.
4. TIP WELL (ON THE PRICE BEFORE THE COUPON).
Here’s something I didn’t know before becoming a waiter: tipped employees are not paid minimum wage plus tips. The minimum wage right now for tipped employees is $2.13. In other words, the employer is only required to pay $2.13/hour and the tipped employee is expected to earn enough in tips to cover the $5.12 difference between that and the federal minimum wage of $7.25. If they don’t, then the employer has to make up the difference. And if that happens too often, that waiter or waitress won’t have their job very long, because they are obviously not performing in ways to generate the necessary tips.
When you tip, you are actually paying their wages! It’s NOT an “extra.” Tipped employees are required to report their tips as income on their tax returns (no, I’m not going to discuss how many people I’ve seen over the years cheat on this…) and depend on those tips to survive.
You’re not doing them a favor by tipping them, so don’t think so high and mighty about it. Your tips pay their grocery and gas bills, and pay for baby formula, diapers, and clothes for their kids.
Don’t be cheap. Tip AT LEAST 15%, and try to go to 20% whenever possible. If you can’t tip at least 15%, then you shouldn’t be eating there.
So don’t tip on the discounted amount after a coupon. Tip on what it would have been without the coupon. They worked just as hard, and it’s not their fault you have a coupon.
Oh yeah – be especially generous at breakfast. Often restaurants have cheap breakfast specials, and that often means smaller tips. And if you’re splitting a meal between two people, tip 30%. You’re still getting the meal cheaper, and you’re recognizing that they’re still working for two meals, even if it’s only one menu item.
5. DON’T BEG FOR A DISCOUNT – IN ANY SITUATION.
This really gets my goat – both as a waiter and a customer who witnesses it: a customer who whines and begs for a discount for a birthday, anniversary, or just a bad hair day (“C’mon, I’ve had a hard day – can’t I at least get a break on my steak and lobster?”).
I’m a pastor, and it used to be customary for restaurants to give a “clergy discount.” I’m in favor of that, but I don’t ask for it. If they have it and I’m already aware of it, I’ll mention it. But I don’t ask if they have one. It says to your server: CHEAPSKATE – and if you’re a pastor, you want to foster a positive reputation, not a negative one.
Others demand a discount when something goes wrong. And they’re not usually polite about it, either. (Why do I get the feeling that everyone reading this has either witnessed it or actually BEEN this person?)
In my experience, discounts are happily given for special occasions when they are printed in the menu (“Birthday Special,” or “Anniversary Special,” “AARP members” Seniors [note: I tried to get the Senior discount once by saying I had been a senior TWICE - in high school and college. She didn't give it to me...]), and they are also happily given when they are OFFERED by the restaurant rather than demanded, especially when something went wrong with the meal. When I’ve had the occasion to point out a mistake and try to laugh it off because of #2 above, my meal is sometimes discounted or even free. I have NEVER asked for a discount or free meal. I have even refused these, because it’s usually no big deal.
Just don’t ask for a discount. You may get it, but you’ll leave a bad taste in the mouth of the server and manager.
6. SMILE WHEN YOU TALK TO YOUR SERVER.
Anybody here actually like being around a grouch? I didn’t think so. Guess what? Neither does your server. I know, you’re having a bad day. But there’s no reason to take it out on your server. Maybe they’re having a bad day, too, and a smile from you could make all the difference.
Smiley customers automatically get better service because servers, being human, enjoy happy people and will do all they can to help them stay that way while they are at the restaurant.
Servers have to deal with crabby people all the time. You don’t have to be one of them.
7. SAY “PLEASE” AND ‘THANK YOU.”
This might surprise you, but SERVERS ARE PEOPLE, TOO, and they deserve respect. They may be ”servers,” but that doesn’t mean you have to treat them like servants who live only to make you happy. Say “please” when asking for a refill and “thanks” when they bring it. Say “please” when asking for a substitution (see #8 below), or more ketchup for your French Fries. Thank them when they bring your order and when they clear your dishes. Thank them when you’re leaving the restaurant and paying your bill. Thank them for loaning you their pen to write your check or sign the debit card slip.
It’s just common courtesy, and I find that it’s not very common at all anymore. Sad.
Be the exception and watch what happens in terms of attitude toward you and service.
8. DON’T PRESSURE FOR SUBSTITUTIONS.
I’ve made a personal rule to never ask for substitutions. I can pretty well put up with the different combinations on any given menu, and if not, I’ll give it to whoever I’m with. Another personal rule that is closely related to this is to only order stuff that’s actually on the menu. When someone comes into a restaurant and asks for something special not on the menu, I just want to scream. Who are you to think that the rules don’t apply to you? Why should the kitchen go to the trouble to treat you to something they don’t offer their other customers? Have you thought that maybe there’s a reason they don’t offer that on the menu? Just sayin’…
Okay, back to the point:
Sometimes the substitution is no big deal and they’re happy to do it. But sometimes it’s very hard for one reason or another. For instance, it may not be able to be done on their computer system. This may cause a major back-up for the server as he/she tries to find a work-around on the computer or tries to find a manager to help them. This is especially hard on new servers who are still learning the menu.
I cringe almost every time I hear someone ask for a substitution, because they often try to whine their way into it or try to guilt the restaurant (“I can’t take that much grease – why do you have to have them together? It’s possible to have potato salad instead, right?”).
Sometimes you need to substitute because of health/allergy reasons. I get that. But often it’s just a personal preference.
If you really think you need to substitute, then remember #7 above. Smile as you ask. And if they can’t do the substitution, smile and thank them anyway. And then order something that’s actually offered on the menu.
9. CORRAL YOUR KIDS.
Guess what? Your kids don’t have the right to run around the restaurant and bother other customers. I don’t care how fragile their self-esteem is. You are responsible for allowing other diners to enjoy their dining experience without your kids screaming and yelling and bumping into them, or having food thrown their way by your little darlings.
Your kids may seem sweet to you, but if they’re doing this stuff, then no one else thinks they’re sweet; they think your kids are brats – and they would be right.
Teach your kids to stay at the table and to talk quietly. Teach them to say “please” and “thank you.” Teach them good manners. Teach them by example.
I loved serving families with well-behaved children. The parents were invariably friendly and polite, and the kids caught that and acted accordingly. You make it a joy for your server when your kids respect them and the others in the restaurant.
10. REMEMBER WHO YOU REPRESENT!
This is directed at those who would call themselves Christians.
If you are a Christian, then you represent Jesus. The question is whether you will reflect WELL on Him or BADLY on Him. Some of the worst people to serve are those who have just come from church on Sunday. Church people can be some of the most rude, demanding, and just plain mean people on the planet sometimes, and it really comes to play when they go out to eat after church.
You should be the easiest people these servers have to deal with all day. You should be the least demanding, the most accommodating, the most polite, the most patient, the most kind.
You should also be the most generous with your tip. AND DON’T YOU DARE LEAVE A GOSPEL TRACT UNLESS YOU LEAVE AN EXTREMELY GENEROUS TIP!!! Leaving a tract and a small tip (or worse yet – NO tip) will spoil any chance you’ll have to win that person to Christ, and make it harder for the rest of us who may have the opportunity to introduce them to Jesus as their hope for this life and the next.
So smile. Be polite. Order what’s on the menu. Be the kind of person others enjoy serving. Represent Jesus well.
If you’ve ever worked at a restaurant, you know that there are some people that make you cringe just by walking in the door or pulling up into the parking lot, because you KNOW it’s going to be a bad time. You wish you could put up the “Closed” sign before they got to the door, or that you had just run out of the thing they always order. But that doesn’t always work, so you have to put up with them. Here’s my suggestion for you: DON’T BE ONE OF THEM!
One last thing: I’ve mentioned a few times that doing these things will usually result in better service, or in some cases, a discount when something goes wrong. However, I am in no way saying you should do these things to manipulate your server into giving you something. That’s just wrong. You do these things because you want to do what Jesus said “Do to others what you want them to do you.” You would want the same treatment if you were the server. Think about that – and let it be the rule for how you treat those who are doing all they can to make your meal an enjoyable one.
Posted by Brian on Aug 30, 2010 in
Pastoring/Leadership,
The Bible I preached from this verse yesterday:
Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you. Hebrews 13:17
I’m currently preaching in a series called “Foundations for Healthy Church Relationships,” and one of the issues that is most pressing in a lot of churches is the need for the congregation to support the leadership – both the pastor and the leadership team in place.
This verse is NOT saying that the pastor can be a dictator. No one is supposed to “rule” over a church. Only Jesus is supposed to do that.
This verse is also NOT saying that the congregation should blindly follow the leadership of a church. The members of that congregation have every right to question and bring concerns, as long as it’s done in a grown-up, Christ-like manner.
So what is this verse saying?
Support your leadership as they lead the church to greater effectiveness for Christ and His Kingdom.
Church leaders are called to lead the church in fulfilling the Great Commission to make disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:18-20) in the spirit of the Great Commandment to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and our neighbor as ourselves (Mark 12:30-31).
When a church’s leadership is on the same page as the congregation regarding this essential mission, then it’s easier for a congregation to support it’s leaders. It’s also less likely that the leadership will abuse its position, because the focus is not on them or even the congregation, it’s on Christ and His mission.
This verse says that leaders will be held accountable for their leadership. This alone should cause leaders to pause and humble themselves before God, asking Him to give them wisdom and a heart for the people they’re leading.
I think that if congregations knew the burden that church leaders are under (whether those leaders realize it or not), they would pray more for their leaders, and not look for things to criticize so quickly.
I’m very grateful for my congregation. I know that many of them pray for me and for our church board. I know that our church board prays for me and the congregation.
One of the benefits of this kind of relationship is that when the leadership makes mistakes regarding how to fulfill that essential mission (and they will), the church is not devastated, and the mission can go forward as God steps in to fill the gaps. I believe that makes a church even stronger.
So while this verse doesn’t give the right to leaders to be dictatorial jerks, it also doesn’t give congregations the right to bring unneccesary strife and division.
Healthy churches are those where the congregation submits to the leadership of the church as they submit to the mission of Christ.
Posted by Brian on Aug 25, 2010 in
Life in General As the last post regarding Quiet Times, I wanted to look at some Quiet Time killers:
Just letting life get in the way of regular time with God. This is very easy to let happen. It happens to me all the time. If you’re easily distracted like me, (HEY – Look at that bird!) you need to take extra care to MAKE Quiet Times happen. And it may be that you simply have to put it in your planner like any other appointment.
We all get busy, we all have things that distract us, but if we’ll discipline ourselves, we can keep our regular appointment with God
Gotta admit – this is a tough one for me, too. At times, I would rather just hang out, surf the net, or do other brainless stuff instead of doing my Quiet Time.
I’ve mentioned before that you should have a plan for Quiet Times. I’ve never been a fan of the “Just open your Bible and start reading where ever it opens to.” That can lead to some pretty erroneous thinking, and I’ve seen it a few times.
God wrote the Bible in a systematic manner, and we should read it that way. Not that you need to start in Genesis every time, but be systematic. Read a gospel from the beginning to the end. Read the New Testament (or the whole Bible) in chronological order. Read the Psalms or Proverbs.
If you’re looking for ideas, go to YouVersion.com. Lots of reading programs you can use that will help you be systematic.
If you’re being systematic in some way, you will gain more knowledge and insight into the Scriptures, and you will also be less frustrated.
- Over-dependence on devotional aids.
As mentioned in Part 9, over-doing it with devotional books means you’re relying too much on someone else’s quiet time instead of your own. Remember that God wants to speak to YOU as much as He wants to speak to someone else, including authors of devotional books.
This is a killer for a lot of people, even me. For me, the issue is that on vacations, I LIKE TO SLEEP! And since vacations can be filled with activity, my Quiet Time can get neglected between my sleeping late and getting to whatever activity or destination I’ve got going for that day. Then I feel guilty, then discouraged, and if I’m not careful, I can simply quit for a while.
Not good, but that’s the way it goes sometimes. Thankfully, I can pick them back up at anytime, and I find that God never left, that He never took a vacation, and that He is even more glad to see me than I am to see Him.
He’s an awesome God. Don’t let these Quiet Time killers get in the way of those awesome times with Him.
Posted by Brian on Aug 25, 2010 in
Aberdeen Wesleyan Church Our church website had to be re-done because of some weird technical glitch. And so we took the opportunity to have it completely re-designed, and I think it’s AWESOME.
Check it out and let me know what you think:
Aberdeen Wesleyan Church
Posted by Brian on Aug 25, 2010 in
Life in General After what seems like a millenium since my last post, I think I’m finally in a position to post more regularly…
I’ve written 8 posts about why Quiet Times/Personal Devotions are so important, and my hope is that if you hadn’t begun to have them previous to those postings, you have since.
If you haven’t, or they’ve become a bit stale (yes – it can happen) here are some ideas for establishing or refreshing your QT:
- Start a Bible reading program.
Read through the New Testament in a year (about 1 chapter a day), or just start reading through the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
Reading through the whole Bible in a year is a bit more involved, but if you’ve never done it before, that may be a great way to liven things up.
A great website to go to for a lot of different reading programs for free is www.youversion.com. You can read the passages there at the website or in your own Bible, and in any case you can track your progress, and do all sorts of things as well. And it’s all free.
Devotional books, which maygive daily/weekly/twice weekly readings., can be great – if they are used once in a while. Probably the most popular devotional book of all time is “My Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers. My personal favorite is “Growing Strong in the Seasons of Life” by Charles Swindoll. I pull it out every few years and go through it for that year.
The only problem is that if you use them too often, you may end up learning too much about other people’s Quiet Times instead of learning to hear from God in your own time.
So feel free to use them – sparingly.
- Devotional journals that allow you to write your own thoughts.
This is basically anything you want to use to write stuff down. It can be anything from a spiral note-book to a fancy bound volume containing Scriptures, poetry, or whatever, but still has room for you to write.
Writing down your thoughts as you read and pray through the Bible is a great way to solidify things in your mind, ask questions, record prayers, and record your spiritual growth over the years.
Personally, I’m not much of a journaling kinda guy, but over the years I have written down thoughts that as I look back on them, remind me of how God was with me – during the good and bad, and how He was working to shape me into someone He could use more effectively no matter where I was or what I was doing for a living.
So those are some ideas that I have used over the years to refresh my Quiet Times. Maybe they’ll do the same for you.
Be blessed.
Tags: devotional book, journal, prayer, quiet time, reading program
Posted by Brian on Jan 11, 2010 in
Life in General Back to the series on Quiet Times and why they are so vital to a vibrant relationship with God. I’ve been having a blast in my personal Quiet Times as I re-read the book of Proverbs. Tons of great wisdom in there.
Today I want to discuss some of the benefits of Quiet Times. I’m sure others can think of more than these, but here are four I want to focus on today:
- Grow in intimate relationship with God.
It’s just a truth of life that the more time we spend with someone, the better we get to know them. And the better we get to know someone, the more intimate the relationship with that person.
I don’t mean just between a man and wife, but in relationships in general.
All of us can think of friendships we have with people that are deeper than others. Your best friend and you share a depth of relationship that only comes from you sharing things that you don’t share with others. You share your joys, frustrations, sadnesses, heartaches, triumphs, and even secrets with that person. They know you better than just about anyone else.
That’s the kind of relationship God wants with you.
He wants you to be able to share with Him at the deepest level of your being. He knows everything you’re going through anyway, so it’s not like you’re letting Him in on some juicy gossip in your life. But you’re talking to Him about it.
And it’s not just a one-way street. He has things to share with you from His Word. If you want to know the heart of God, then you need to get in the Bible. You’ll find the things that give Him joy, that concern Him, that anger Him, that hurt Him.
And just like in a human relationship, your relationship with God can become intimate – even more intimate than any human relationship.
Look at this in Proverbs 13:20 -
He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
If you want to be wise, you hang out with wise people. And who is wiser than God Himself? The Scriptures are full of wisdom – God’s wisdom!
His wisdom is applicable to every area of life you can imagine: work, family, marriage, money, etc. God has something to say about all this and more. And believe it or not, He knows what He’s talking about in these areas more than you do!
When you hang out with God, you gain wisdom from God. That’s an awesome benefit of having regular Quiet Times.
- Learn to recognize Jesus’ voice amid all the voices crying for our attention.
Just to be clear – I’m not talking about the audible voice of Jesus. I’ve never heard it that I know of. Scripture doesn’t say we should expect to hear it. I’m talking about how to recognize the truth of Jesus in the midst of all the other “truths” that are out there.
The world cries out for our attention in any number of ways, but let me discuss the fact that there are many religious voices that cry for our attention, and which are contrary to Christ.
Countless numbers of people, both famous and not famous are putting forth messages and pronouncements that are totally contradictory to the message of Christ. And if the message is contradictory to Christ, it is a lie, plain and simple. He said that He is the truth (John 14:6). Therefore, if it goes against Him, it is error.
The only way to be able to clearly understand and filter out the truth of Christ from what is being offered by the world is to get in His Word. Become familiar with what He says. Then you can recognize truth from error.
It takes time and effort. But the more you read the words of Jesus, the more understanding you get.
When bank tellers are trained to spot counterfeit bills, they are not given fake bills to look at. They are given real bills. They study the real thing so well they can recognize the fake stuff. It’s the same way with Christ. Study the “real thing” so you can recognize the fake stuff. Then you can hear the voice of Christ and follow Him.
- Grow in faith as we see God work in us and as we see Him answer prayer.
The Scriptures are filled with examples of God working in and through people. Ordinary people. People like you and me.
For that to happen, we need to be “workable.” In other words, we need to become people in whom God lives and can mold for His purposes. Quiet Times are the incubator, if you will, for that to happen.
As we read and meditate on God’s word (see part 6 for what I mean by meditation), He begins to make us into someone He can use to impact other people for Him.
And as we become that kind of person, God does an amazing thing: He uses us! He puts people in our path who need what we have gained in our relationship with God. Maybe it’s an encouraging word, or maybe it’s how to make sure you’re going to heaven when they die. It can be any number of things.
And as our relationship with Christ grows, so does our faith in Him and what He can do. And therefore, we can pray more confidently for those around us and for ourselves.
(And don’t you just hate it when people begin sentences with “And?”)
We pray because we see that God’s power is not limited. That’s not to say we can make demands of God or pray for things that God has already said He won’t do (bless a sinful lifestyle, for instance). It simply means that when we pray from a good understanding of Scripture, our faith grows as we see Him answer those prayers.
That’s a major blessing, folks. I can tell you from experience.
Those are four blessings, and chances are I could go into greater detail or explain something better. But there you go.
If I haven’t been clear about something, let me know. Otherwise, feel free to comment on other benefits you have found in having regular Quiet Times with God.
Tags: benefits, faith, growth, quiet time, relationship with God, wisdom